If I Could Have Ten Super Powers – Tuesday Ten

Moms, by definition, are super human. We can go for hours without food, days without sleep… we can swiftly maneuver around block towers and are adept at dodging spaghetti and sippy cups. And strength? Let’s just say I never saw Superman at 9 months pregnant

1. X-Ray Vision
I’d love to be able to peer through a wall and see if my son is climbing the curtains or if my daughter has decided to spontaneously disrobe. What I wouldn’t give to prevent the fall out from hijinx behind closed doors. I’m pretty good, but x-ray vision would make me great.

2. Super Speed
I do what I can, but I really wish I could do a lot more. There are only 24 hours in a day and I just can’t seem to squeeze it all in. I always feel like I’m going at full speed, but if I could go just a bit faster I could accomplish more.

3. Stop Time
Quite possibly the only way to solve the lack of time in a day is to simply stop while I accomplish what I need to. I could snatch the falling vase out of the air before it hits the ground. Or grab an extra hour of snuggles with my sleeping littles. Stopping time would be nice indeed.

4. Healing Ability
For when the flu strikes the whole house at the same time… for when Pressy bumps his noggin. I think all mothers wish they had the ability to take away the tiniest amounts of pain. I’m not sure how this power would effect first best friend betrayals, heartbreaks, or losing the big game. I just know I would love to be able to heal. There’s only one person in that business though so… a dream it will remain.

5. Super Stretch Arms
I cannot count the number of times I’ve left the wipes clear on the other side of the room. It is worse than no TP on the roll… worse than a swallow of milk in the carton. There are the wipes in plain sight – and I can’t reach them. Oh the humanity! With super stretch arms I could reach over to the counter and snatch them. But for now, I’ll have to half-way slap this diaper back on the kid and haul him over to the wipes so he doesn’t escape.

6. Invisibility
Aside from this being overall cool, it is a power most nosy people would go for. I wouldn’t say I’m nosy “per se.” I just like to be in the know *wink*. What are my kids really up to when they think I’m not around? What does Mama really think of my casserole? I would imagine I could learn a lot about other people and myself in the process. Growth through resentment formed while spying. There’s a superhero headed for a complex.

7. Ability to Fly
Um. So Who wouldn’t want to fly? I would simply take off from my porch — head west to the wineries or east to the snow. It would be so amazing to have a birds eye view of the mountains. There are some perks to valley living in Sacramento.

8. Telekinesis
How awesome and easy would housework be if it could be done with my mind. With just a thought toys would be put in boxes, cushions adjusted, pillows fluffed. Who am I kidding? I’d use it mostly just to neatly wind the vacuum cord back on the thingies.

9. Psychic Ability
I would love to be able to see what was coming next. The mommy in me needs to be prepared. NEEDS to have control. The truth is even if I had the psychic ability there are still some things I’d never be able to control. But I would maybe hit the lottery… just once… just for good measure.

10. Laser Eyes
Seems impractical… but imagine. Woodburning crafts, lighting birthday candles, renovation, bank robberies, lighting the fireplace, instant grilling, creme brulee torching, cat entertainment joy. Need I say more?

Alas, I am a mere mortal. However, I believe we all possess something super-human within us. Trials of life will test our strength. But our triumphs will prove we are heroes.

The Golden Spoons